Lose Yourself Frodo and Other Song Parodies!
by KRRouse
Summary: Title says it all. Testing out my song parodying skills. : Please R&R.
1. Lose Yourself Frodo

Disclaimer: I own nothing. Period. End.  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
"Lose Yourself Frodo", sung by Frodo to the tune of Eminem's "Lose Yourself." .  
  
.  
  
Look  
  
If you had  
  
One shot  
  
One opportunity  
  
To destroy the Dark Lord Sauron  
  
In three movies  
  
Would you go for it?  
  
Or just let it slip?  
  
Yo  
  
My palms are sweaty  
  
Knees weak  
  
Ring is heavy  
  
There's orcs shooting at us already  
  
Running steady  
  
Gandalf's nervous  
  
But on the surface he looks calm and ready  
  
To take down  
  
The Balrog on the setting  
  
But he falls down  
  
The whole crowd  
  
Calls so loud  
  
He opens his mouth  
  
Only three words come out  
  
He's dyin' now  
  
Everybody's cryin' now  
  
I'm fading out  
  
Dream's done  
  
.  
  
Over, BLOW!  
  
.  
  
.Snap back to reality  
  
Oh! There goes gravity!  
  
Oh! There go Sam and me  
  
Gollum! I'm so mad that he  
  
Won't give up easily  
  
No! he can't have it, he knows  
  
Without the Ring, he's toast  
  
And that bothers him most  
  
Won't be long 'till he's broke  
  
He's so mad 'cause he knows  
  
If he gets back to his murky home  
  
That's when it's  
  
Back on his search again, yo  
  
That means Sam and me  
  
Better get moving and hurry and toss the Ring  
  
.  
  
Or you're gonna  
  
.  
  
.Lose yourself  
  
In the legend, the One Ring  
  
You'll want it  
  
You'll wanna never let it go  
  
I've only got one shot, I'm not  
  
Missin' my chance to go  
  
To Mount Doom to destroy  
  
The Dark Lord Sauron  
  
You're gonna  
  
.  
  
.Lose yourself  
  
In the legend, the One Ring  
  
You'll want it  
  
You'll wanna never let it go  
  
I've only got one shot, I cannot  
  
Miss my chance to go  
  
To Mount Doom and defeat  
  
The Dark Lord Sauron  
  
You're gonna  
  
.  
  
.Sauron's escaping  
  
Through the One Ring, it's gaping  
  
This world is his for the taking  
  
Nazgul King!  
  
As we move toward the  
  
Gates of Mordor  
  
The quest gets far from boring  
  
'Cause right now Gollum  
  
Wants to head toward a  
  
Route that's much harder  
  
And goes on much farther  
  
One slip, it's all over  
  
He's true to his honor  
  
And so, on we go  
  
It's getting' way harder  
  
Lonely roads on and on  
  
Farther and farther  
  
The Eye's burnin' hotter  
  
We move on and every day it grows hotter  
  
We made it through the Dead Marsh, that's a starter  
  
My mind ain't mine anymore, it's like Gollum  
  
Who moves on to his next soul  
  
They call Smeagol  
  
Who's small and knows nadda  
  
And so his soap opera concludes and unfolds  
  
To dispose his old partner  
  
But the tale goes on  
  
De de dum, de dum da da  
  
.  
  
I'm gonna  
  
.  
  
Lose myself  
  
In the legend, the One Ring  
  
I've got it  
  
I'm gonna never let it go  
  
I've only got one shot, I'm not  
  
Missin' my chance to go  
  
To Mount Doom to destroy  
  
The Dark Lord Sauron  
  
You're gonna  
  
.  
  
Lose yourself  
  
In the legend, the One Ring  
  
You'll want it  
  
You'll wanna never let it go  
  
I've only got one shot, I'm not  
  
Missin' my chance to go  
  
To Mount Doom to destroy  
  
The Dark Lord Sauron  
  
You're gonna  
  
.  
  
No more games, I've been changed  
  
I'm filled with rage  
  
We were captured by some rangers  
  
And locked up, caged  
  
My goal was simple in the beginning  
  
The mood all changed  
  
I've been brain-washed  
  
And chopped up  
  
And forced on stage  
  
But I kept trying and kept pace with old Strider  
  
Gettin' drawn to Mount Doom like rats to Pied Piper  
  
All the pain inside amplified by the  
  
Fact that I can't get by in this kind of  
  
Fight. And I can't provide the right type of  
  
Life for my friend 'cause man, that old Faramir's mood just won't lighten  
  
Might be a movie, but man, the plot's hyper  
  
This is my quest and these times are so hard  
  
And it's gettin' even harder  
  
Trying to save the world around me, plus Sam and all them  
  
I'm torn  
  
Between being a hero and an ego-swollen  
  
Monster. Faramir brings me down, and it's too much for me to wanna  
  
Stand in spot  
  
And have it all forgot  
  
He's gotten me  
  
To the point I'm like a snail, I've got  
  
To formulate a plot  
  
Or end up with Smeagol shot  
  
Escape is our only run-a-mucking option  
  
Capture's not  
  
Sam I love you and that's why we've got to go  
  
I cannot fall prey  
  
To Sauron's plot  
  
So here we go; our last shot  
  
Feet fail us not  
  
This may be the only opportunity that we got  
  
.  
  
Or we're gonna  
  
.  
  
Lose ourselves  
  
To the legend, the One Ring  
  
We've got it  
  
We're gonna have to let it go  
  
We've only got one shot, We're not  
  
Missin' our chance to go  
  
To Mount Doom to destroy  
  
The Dark Lord Sauron  
  
You're gonna  
  
.  
  
Lose yourself  
  
In the legend, the One Ring  
  
You'll want it  
  
You'll wanna never let it go  
  
I've only got one shot, I'm not  
  
Missin' my chance to go  
  
To Mount Doom to destroy  
  
The Dark Lord Sauron  
  
You're gonna  
  
.  
  
We can do anything we set our minds to, Sam...  
  
.  
  
. .  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Sorry about all those periods just floating around. I couldn't get the formatting to work any other way. Review me! 


	2. Eye of the Dark Lord

Disclaimer: Don't own it. I'm not Tolkein, and that's all I have to say about that.  
  
Just for the record, I'm not Forrest Gump either.  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
"Eye of the Dark Lord", sung by Frodo during that scene in ROTK where Sauron's eye is looking around from Bara-Dur. Set to the tune of "Eye of the Tiger" by Survivor.  
  
.  
  
.  
  
Standin' up  
  
Firm and discreet  
  
No more time; take our chances  
  
Walked quite a ways, can barely stand on our feet  
  
Just two hobbits and their will to survive  
  
A daunting quest; it happened so fast  
  
So great a tale of fate and glory  
  
Can't lose my grip on my mind to this Ring  
  
Got to fight, got to keep myself alive  
  
.  
  
It's the Eye of the Dark Lord  
  
And it fills me with fright  
  
Rising up, as I dread of his arrival  
  
He will leave no survivors  
  
If he conquers the night  
  
And he's watching me now through the Eye  
  
Of the Dark Lord  
  
.  
  
Face to face  
  
Out in the heat  
  
My legs are weak, and I'm hungry  
  
He's stacked the odds, and the mountain is steep  
  
But we go on, with the will to survive  
  
.  
  
It's the Eye of the Dark Lord  
  
Such a terrible sight  
  
Blood runs cold, as I gaze at my old rival  
  
We, the last known survivors  
  
Stagger on through the night  
  
As he searches for me with the Eye  
  
Of the Dark Lord  
  
.  
  
Climbin' up  
  
Straight to the top  
  
So near the end of the story  
  
We've gone the distance, and we're not gonna stop  
  
Though the fear is too great to describe  
  
.  
  
It's the Eye of the Dark Lord  
  
And his flame burns so bright  
  
Growing strong, oh so close to his revival  
  
There will be no survivors  
  
Should his Ring reunite  
  
But I know we will conquer the Eeeeeeeeeeeye  
  
Of the Dark Lord  
  
.  
  
Duh, duh duh duh, duh duh duh, duh duh duh  
  
.  
  
The Eye of the Dark Lord...  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
How was that? It came to mind practically the instant I posted the first chapter. Guess I was in parody mode or something. Review me!  
  
...And if it's not too much trouble, could you review my other story too? I know eleven chapters looks kind of discouraging, but I'd really appreciate it if you took the time.  
  
Cya,  
  
KRRouse 


	3. Fellowship of the Ring

Disclaimer: Don't own didley, which stinks.  
  
"Fellowship Of (The) Ring", sung by Aragorn. Set to the tune of "Yellow Submarine" by The Beatles. .  
  
. .  
  
In the town, of Rivendell  
  
Lord Elrond, called a meet  
  
And we talked, about Sauron  
  
And formed the Fellowship, of the Ring  
  
. .  
  
So we trekked, under the sun  
  
And across the, fields of green  
  
To the Mines, of Moria  
  
We, the Fellowship, of the Ring  
  
. .  
  
We're all part of the Fellowship of (the) Ring  
  
Fellowship of (the) Ring  
  
Fellowship of (the) Ring  
  
We're all part of the Fellowship of (the) Ring  
  
Fellowship of (the) Ring  
  
Fellowship of (the) Ring  
  
. .  
  
Me and all, the hobbits, four  
  
Legolas the Elf, Gimli the Dwarf  
  
Boromir, and Gandalf too  
  
(Music solo)  
  
We're all part of the Fellowship of (the) Ring  
  
Fellowship of (the) Ring  
  
Fellowship of (the) Ring  
  
We're all part of the Fellowship of (the) Ring  
  
Fellowship of (the) Ring  
  
Fellowship of (the) Ring  
  
. .  
  
Gandalf fell, and ceased to be  
  
And the leader's role, passed to me  
  
Boromir, was shot and killed  
  
And the hobbits, four, went separate ways  
  
. .  
  
We've lost most of the Fellowship of (the) Ring  
  
Fellowship of (the) Ring  
  
Fellowship of (the) Ring  
  
We've lost most of the Fellowship of (the) Ring  
  
Fellowship of (the) Ring  
  
Fellowship of (the) Ring  
  
All that's left of the Fellowship of (the) Ring  
  
Fellowship of (the) Ring  
  
Fellowship of (the) Ring  
  
All that's left of the Fellowship of (the) Ring  
  
Are the hunters, three  
  
Are the hunters, three  
  
.  
  
. . How was that? I know it sounded a little awkward because "Fellowship of the Ring" has one more syllable in it than "Yellow Submarine", but I think it's easy to sing. Please review! 


	4. The Ring Wraiths

Disclaimer: Don't own anything. Truth sucks, don't it?  
  
. .  
  
. .  
  
. .  
  
"The Ring Wraiths", sung by Frodo to the tune of "Real World" by Matchbox 20.  
  
. .  
  
. .  
  
(I) Wonder what they'd do to me, the Ringbearer  
  
(I) Wonder what they'd do to me to get back the Ring  
  
They found out from Gollum  
  
And now they're lopping heads off everyone  
  
(That's) Why my friends and I are on the...run  
  
On the run  
  
. .  
  
(I'm) Not exactly what you'd call a, super hero  
  
(I) Never wanted to leave home to meet Gandalf downtown, yeah  
  
Just four little hobbits  
  
Who've never been outside of Hobbitton  
  
With Riders on the look-out for some...one  
  
For someone  
  
. .  
  
Yeeeeaaaaaaaah!  
  
. .  
  
Gandalf, why did you  
  
Have to give me the Ring?  
  
Give it to someone else  
  
Before I'm torn apart  
  
Strange, where were you  
  
When we started this quest?  
  
I wish the Ring Wraiths  
  
Would just stop looking for me  
  
. .  
  
Gandalf? Samwise? Save meeeee...  
  
. .  
  
(We) Finally got to Bree but couldn't, find Gandalf  
  
(And) Then I dropped the Ring and accidentally disappeared  
  
(I disappeared)  
  
We met up with Strider  
  
And set out early morn' to Wethertop  
  
(Which) Proved to be a lousy resting...stop  
  
Rest stop  
  
. .  
  
Yeeeeaaaaaaaah!  
  
. .  
  
Strider, why did you  
  
Have to leave us all here?  
  
Come back right now or else  
  
We'll be all torn apart  
  
Strange, where were you  
  
When we stayed here to rest?  
  
I wish the Ring Wraiths  
  
Would just quit stabbing at me . . .  
  
. Things look bad  
  
We're dead meat  
  
'Cause they just won't stop  
  
Until they find the Ring  
  
Keep those Wraiths, away, from me . . .  
  
. Gandalf? Strider? Save meeeee!  
  
. .  
  
Yeah!  
  
. .  
  
Yeeeeaaaaaaaah!  
  
Bilbo, why did you  
  
Choose to leave me the Ring  
  
Rather than someone else?  
  
I'll be all torn apart  
  
Strange, where did you  
  
Go when you ditched the guests?  
  
I wish the Ring Wraiths  
  
Would just quit looking for me  
  
. .  
  
I wish the Ring Wraiths  
  
Would just quit stabbing at me  
  
. .  
  
I wish the Ring Wraiths  
  
Would just quit hassling me!  
  
.  
  
Don't you? Won't you...save meeeee?!  
  
. .  
  
. . . (Yeah, I know: 3 out of 4 songs sung by Frodo. But he's my second favorite character, and he has the Ring, so a lot more creepy and cool stuff happens to him. Anyway, I hope you all got a good laugh out of this one. Please R&R) 


	5. Saruman We're Even

Disclaimer: I don't own anything. That simple.

..................................

"Saruman (We're Even)", sung by Merry, Pippin, and Treebeard to the tune of "Anthem" by Good Charlotte.  
  
**Merry:**

On the first day

We set on our quest

Off to Mordor

The ultimate test

But Saruman, he really hit us haaaaaard

.

Carried away 

By the Uruk-hai

All alone now

Just Pip and I

We were ambushed, which finally made me see

.

That we never should have left the Shire 

I don't know what gave us that desire

I hope that we make it home some day

We ran into the forest!

Pip ran into the forest with meeeeeee

.

We ran and climbed up a tree

.

What I'm saying is 

It stepped on Grishnakh,

Lifted me right up!

Hooooooome! I wanna go home!

.

(Music)

.

**Pippin:**

We met Treebeard

The talking tree

"I am an Ent"

That's what he said to me

Then he took us, down, to, have an Entmoooooooot

.

They had a meeting 

And after some time

They decided

That we were on their side

But as for Isengard, they paid no mind

.

Boy I really wish that this would end 

I just wanna go home with my friends

To the peaceful Shire, good and green

But things are only gonna

Things are only gonna get wooooorse!

.

And Merry got a little terse

.

What I'm saying is 

Please take us south now

I've got a new plan

Leeeet's gooooo

Walk by Isengard

.

Tell them once, they shrug 

Tell them twice, they don't care

Show them dead trees, they plot revenge on Saruman

.

(Music)

.

**Treebeard:**  
Hoooooom!

We're getting back at Saruman

What I'm saying is

We go to war now

Probably our doom

Squash all the orcs and, release the river

Hoooooom!

We're getting back at Saruman (Saruman)

We go to war now

Probably our doom

Squash all the orcs and, release the river

.

Saruman, we're even! (Whoa-oh!)

.

**Pippin:  
**  
Saruman, we're even! (Whoa-oh!)

.

**Merry:**  
  
Saruman, we're even! (Whoa-oh!)

.

**All:  
**  
Saruman, we're even!

.

...........................................

(Just for the record, I really don't like Good Charlotte, but that song was just asking to be parodied. Please R&R!)


	6. Gandalf is Free

(Disclaimer: I do not own Lord of the Rings or any of the song tunes I use on here.)

"Gandalf's Free," a parody of "Free" by Faith Hill.

--

Yeah yeah yeah, yeah yeah yeah…

It all began when Frodo Baggins found the Ring  
I went to see old Saruman,  
And try to figure out some things  
But it turned out that he'd been evil from the start  
He may have won the wizard fight, but I'm not easy to outsmart  
'Cause I had just enough wits left in my head  
Just enough to plan escape  
Just enough to think of what to do  
I snatched that moth, from the air and sent him on his little mission  
Then the eagle came along, and off we flew

Greed can cause changes  
Saruman's wages,  
Are in favor of the Dark Lord  
Ringwraiths search for us  
Sound the dark chorus  
Time to leave this traitor's place

I'm free  
Flyin' out of Isengard  
I am free  
Singin' that song of Enya's  
"May It Be"  
Nobody's gonna pull the wool down over, me…yeah-ah!

Yeah yeah yeah, yeah yeah yeah…

"_There is only one Lord of the Rings!"_

We had a council, and we formed a Fellowship  
The other eight gave me the lead,  
Because my mind works like a whip  
But in the Moria mines,  
I lost my memory  
Kept makin' wrong turns, found Balin's tomb  
And then the Balrog made a scene

I held up my staff  
Said "You shall not pass,"  
Stood my ground and kept my cool, yeah  
But this sparked some agitation,  
And that Balrog charged at me  
Flash! Crack! Fall! Now, fly you fools!

But I'm free!  
Climbin' out of that mountain  
I am free  
Flyin' east to find Rohan  
Now you see  
I have become the strongest Istari…yeah!

Great escapes on Gwahir's back,  
Do come in handy, sure  
But we'll need a lot of soldiers  
To survive this war…Yeah-a-ah!

I'm free!  
Ah-ee-yah, ah-ee-yah, ah-ee-ya-ee-ya-ee-yah!  
Ah-ee-yah, ah-ee-yah, ah-ee-ya-ee-ya-ee-yah!  
I'm free!  
Ah-ee-yah, ah-ee-yah, ah-ee-ya-ee-ya-ee-yah!  
Ah-ee-yah, ah-ee-yah, ah-ee-ya-ee-ya-ee-yah!

I'm free!  
Ridin' to the White City  
I am free  
Gonna be mighty busy  
Best hurry (best hurry!)  
Nobody's gonna wanna mess around with, me…oh yeah!

Please hurryyyy!  
Gimli, yeah!  
Legolas!  
Aragorn, hurryyyyyy!  
Hurryyyyyyy!

Arrows fly and swords swing back,  
While Rohan blows its horn  
Then along comes the Dead Army,  
Lead by Aragorn!

Now I'm free!  
Whoa-oo-oh, whoah-oo-oh, whoah-oo-oh-oo-oh-oo-oh!  
Whoa-oo-oh, whoah-oo-oh, whoah-oo-oh-oo-oh-oo-oh!  
Yeah, I'm free! Lucky me! Oh!

Free. Istariiiiiiiii…

--

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Woo-hoo! How long's it been since I updated this story? Hope you like the new song!


	7. Can't Stop My Cleaving

(Disclaimer: I own nothing. Sniffle…)

--

I believe it was Robyn who requested (three years ago) that I write a song parody for Gimli, and here it is!

"Can't Stop My Cleaving," sung by our favorite psychotic dwarf to the tune of "Don't Stop Believing" by Journey.

--

Just a mountain dwarf,  
Swinging my axe back and forth,  
At monsters running towards me from everywheeeeere

Just a forest elf,  
Really in love with himself  
He shoots his arrows at them from everywheeeeere

(music)

The Uruks and their ugly gloom,  
Come along to spell our doom,  
In a battle that could last all night,  
And go on beyond the crack of dawn

Uruks, climbing,  
Up and down their ladder traps  
Their weapons, gleaming—such a fri-i-iiiiiight!  
See them, tense up, then I jump right into motion  
Swinging, ready for the fiiiiiiight!

Chopping heads, is such a thrill!  
Something in me loves to kill,  
Really anything that walks upright  
And now's the tiiiiiiime!  
Always win, never lose  
But my elf friend has some news  
He's killed seventeen of them!  
I'll be hacking bones until the dawn!

Arrows, flying,  
Never missing any marks,  
While I swing my axe with all of my might!  
Nineteen! Twenty! Twenty-one—the death toll's rising,  
And it's, all feeling so riiiiiiight!

(music)

Can't stop my cleaving!  
Hands are starting to lose feeling  
Twenty-seven, there we gooooooooooo!

Can't stop my cleaving!  
I woooooooooooooon't,  
Lose to an elf, never, noooooooooooo!

Can't stop my cleaving!  
Won't waste my time healing!  
I will win this, I knooooooooooow!!!

--


End file.
